Must Love Cheese

New Year's Eve 2006 was the best! Here are some highlight quotes as we (Peggy, Julie, and I) spent most of the day in the Mt. Auburn Hospital's ER, and then on to a movie.

"I had a dream that I was in a dating service and I was explaining that my match would have to love all kinds of cheese, like Gouda, blue , Havarti, Gorgonzola, Brie etc. Totally weird." -me
"A new movie, Must Love Cheese."-Julie


"You never forget your first kiss..."-KISS fragrance advertisement
"What?! Does it smell like body odor and bong resin?"-Peggy

"Do you have SARS?"-me after walking in and seeing Peggy as the only one in the ER waiting room with a face mask

"You know you're going to pay for that later...wearing those pointy, tall shoes."-Patricia the Nurse noticing my fabulous boots

"Do you ever look at people and want to fix them?"-Julie

"You mean I get all these great Funk classics on just One Compact DISC?"-Julie

"You get a urine on her? Oh, okay!!"-some random dude just outside the curtain

"Could that really be my breath? That is rancid...it has to be some thing with this mask...my breath has never smelled that way...does yours smell funky?...I'm never getting kissed."-me


"That's really nice, but he's not a nurse...I am. The IV needs to be fast."-Patricia the Nurse/Nazi's disapproval of the X-ray tech messing with Peg's IV.

"I love watching when they first put the tubes on while they draw blood, it gushes in."-Julie
"I freakin' love rainbow snow's tiger's blood."-me

"What's Excedrin?"-Doctor Dan Tang (the woman)

"Ew...it's getting stuck on my IV...help me...Ew, Ew."-Peggy

"I'm about ready to stretch out on Peggy's bed...wouldn't it be funny if she came back and we were spooning?"-Julie

"Don't look at my pee...Don't."-Peggy

"What are you eating? Shoot."-Peggy figuring out what she would say if we were caught feeding her chocolate

"Guys...I met the real doctor..."-Peggy
"The REAL doctor?"-me
"Dan's just a resident, she's not there yet."-Peggy

"I need a drink, but all I have is this two dollar bill in my pocket."-Julie

"He's cute, kind of like Jimmy on Superman."-Peggy

"Give me a back massage while I'm sitting on your bed..."-me...joking with the invalid
"Not with my IV."-Peggy too serious and too drugged

"Toughen up girls...get dressed, I'll be back."-Patricia the Nazi

"How can you be hitting on me at a time like this..."-Julie on the N./X-ray incident

"She hates me...I try to be cute and adorable..."-Peggy referring to the Nazi
"And she's like 'whatever I saw you eat that chocolate orange.'"-me

"Like he really cares about you that much you dramatic biotch!"-me talking about a song
"Are you talking to me?"-my dad who answered the phone right as I said that

"When I get to the movie theater, I'm going to undo my pants."-Peggy

I hope you enjoyed these gems as much as I did. Hoorah 2007!!!

Back at the High Wire

(Drum roll)

(All eyes are fixed on the performer who has successfully, and gracefully inched her way to the middle of the wire, but here she pauses.)

The Amazing Rachelli's Inner Dialogue: Wait a minute...What am I doing?! How did I get here?! I'm terrified of heights! I CAN'T SEE!! Stupid!!

(Her knees begin to bend and the balance bar sways in such a way that she must let go to keep herself on the wire. The bar falls to the floor below with a reverberating bang. The crowd shrieks, and a baby begins to cry.)

Okay, okay...deep breath, straighten up, arms out.

(She regains her balance as she stretches her arms out from her sides.)

I don't know exactly how I got here, but I'm the one who climbed the ladder to the platform. I'm the one who put the blindfold over my eyes. I'm the one who took these steps over the abyss. Now I only have three choices...I can go back, I can go forward, or I can fall off the wire. I only know that it took me 25 steps to get here, I don't know how many steps I have to take to get to the other platform. I can't turn around...and going backwards would be more difficult than taking steps forward. I refuse to fall. Okay...forward then. Heel, toe, poise, heel, toe, control, heel, toe, breathe.

(Drum roll continues, the audience exhales as she slowly moves forward.)

TO BE CONTINUED...

I know you know I know, but I don't know what you know you know.

Welcome to the random and bizarre circus that is me...

Ring Leader: Laaydees and Gentallmen...may I have your attention please...for this next act I ask you to direct your eyes skyward....

(Spotlight hits a girl in a fabulous sparkly costume at the top of a very high tower.)

Tonight, Ladies and Gentlemen the Amazing Rachelli will perform a feat as never before seen.

(Girl in sparkly costume smiles and waves.)

Yes...Tonight...the Amazing Rachelli will attempt to cross the high wire that is situated 150 feet above your heads...without the aid of a safety net.

(Drum roll)

But that is not all folks...please be advised, what you are about to see is not for the faint of heart...for not only will she be crossing the monstrous gap on a very thin wire without a safety net...she will also be...blindfolded!

(Drum roll continues, a horrified gasp comes from the audience, the girl holds up a black satin handkerchief and ties it around her head covering her eyes.)

Now folks, I will ask you to keep your eyes fixed and your fingers crossed, and your prayers silent so that the Amazing Rachelli may fully concentrate...

(Drum roll continues, she picks up the balancing bar and moves forward to the edge of the platform, first step...heel, then toe. The audience holds their breath.)

TO BE CONTINUED...

Santa Claus

I don't know how this hasn't happened before, but I witnessed my first Santa visit last night. I sat gazing down at the whole thing from my perch at the top of the stairs. Even though I'm old enough to participate in the drop, I still feel like I don't quite belong. So, I played sentinel on the lookout for rousing children. I felt spoiled in a way...watching the magic unfold filled me with the excitement of Christmas, but something was lost at the same time. All the while I was nervous some Cindy Lou Who would wake up and catch us, and that would just be bad.
I decided this is kind of like life...great things are happening all the time unbeknownst to us, while we are dreaming of sugar plums. There is excitement and anticipation and hope for all the things we want, but if we try to break in too soon to what's coming to us we'll blow the whole thing. It's all about timing. Santa knows a thing or two about that...he knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake bit. Hmm...thanks for the life lesson Santa.

New Base Camp; 44° 38' 124° 03'

I'm guessing it's strange for any person when their parents move from the house they grew up in to a totally new place, it definitely is strange for me. But the new place has my official stamp of approval, despite the 8 hour plane ride (not including lay-overs), and the 2 hour drive to the town, it's gorgeous! My parents now live in a vacation town, I've seen real live sea lions and whales...totally rad. This is way more fun than the old homestead.
I must admit I will miss the land Bountiful for nostalgic reasons, but I'm learning that there comes a time in your life when you make your own home. That's bean-town for me. The traffic, the parking tickets, the stink, the taxis, the harbor, Storrow and Mem drive, my favorite pan-handlers on Newbury, the Red Sox of course, love it, love it, love it. So, I guess I'm okay with my parents packing up and discarding their previous life because I don't really belong there anymore anyway. I've made myself a home of my own.

be gentle it's my first time.

So, I've decided to join the human race circa 2006. Thank you to my sweet Sherpa who has made this all possible. Now if we could just get a couple of good yaks.
Who invented paisley anyway, and why?